[ Well. They've been here for a full day now, so at this point, there's not much sense in giving any further consideration to the idea that this might just be a dream. And that means there's no point in putting off that tabled conversation with Julius any longer either — Rideaux has never been one to shy away from the reality of a situation anyway, even when that reality is, as it is so often for him, miserable garbage.
So evening comes, and with no pressing urge to return to the uncomfortably familiar sterility of his own room, Rideaux comes to stop outside of Julius's instead, giving the door a sharp double-rap that's probably instantly recognizable as his own knock.
[ Luckily for his ego, maybe, it doesn't take too long before the door opens up. Julius' coat is gone, presumably hanging up on the coat rack that all the rooms have. He sighs, adjusting his glove. ]
Run out of things to do already?
[ Even if they had more to talk about, he figured it'd be at least a little bit longer before he got around to following up on it. ]
Apparently not, if it's taken this long to get back around to it.
[ But he quickly relents, moving back into the room and letting Rideaux in without much more of a comment, finding a spot against a wall to lean against and crosses his arms. ]
[ Ugh, you're the one who gave him that "later" shit when he asked the first time!! ]
I wanted to be certain that this wasn't all simply some elaborate dream before I resorted to using my time off on something as unpleasant as speaking with you.
[ He shuts the door behind him with more force than necessary, right on beat with that last word; then comes to take a similar stance against the adjacent wall. ]
So, tell me what you were putting off saying earlier. Why that theory that they never encountered me because I was already here wasn't plausible.
[ He already has a pretty good idea — the same immediate thought that had frozen him in his tracks after that first "Doesn't seem like your plan worked" the other day — and he absolutely hates it. He's not going to be the one to put it out there, though; he's going to make Julius say it to his face. ]
[ He doesn't immediately respond, pushing his glasses up. There's no easy way to say this, especially after everything they've been through. After a moment, he sighs before getting into it: ]
Like I said before, I met up with Ludger and the rest of his group in Marksburg, after they managed to get out of Spirius. [ beat ] Not long after that, Bisley entered Canaan with the Key.
[ There's not a lot of inflection in his tone, but even if he knows that Rideaux knows already, it's pretty clear that he didn't mean that Elle was the way to get there. ]
Edited (playing the pronoun game is fun when everyone's a he) 2021-08-18 12:25 (UTC)
[ Mm... yep, there it is. Not that there'd ever really been much doubt about that outcome since he'd first heard that "soul bridge" rumor fifteen years ago, but somehow it still hits unexpectedly hard to have confirmation that everything he'd ever done had been for fucking nothing.
And that's what this is — as much as he hates Julius, he knows him better than anyone, and he knows he's too boring to bother making something like this up just to mess with someone. And as nice as it would be to be able to pretend he could somehow change that outcome himself if he went back, they're both from the prime dimension. If Julius is from a later point in time than he is, then it's already set in stone. He's stubborn enough to spend more than a decade fighting a near-certain losing battle, but he's not an idiot.
Maybe the most offensive part of this is that even his last ditch backup plan — if one could even call it that — had apparently been a failure. If a loss had been inevitable, he would have at least tried to make sure Ludger killed him so that Bisley couldn't. Had Ludger seen through that, or had he just pitied him and thought that he was doing him some kind of favor by letting him live?
Classic Kresnik, honestly. Can't even let him have his one last fuck-you to the world.
He stares straight ahead, over the hospital bed in the center of the room, at some unremarkable spot on the wall opposite him.
[ Maybe if this was fifteen years ago, this would've been way more of a relief than it is. But it's hard to take anything about this as a victory, even a pyrrhic one. ]
I don't know what happened. Ludger didn't say what went on between you two. It seemed like they didn't know how it got to that point.
[ Even if he knew about the soul bridge then, it felt out of character for Ludger to be willing to let that happen, even to someone he was at odds with. He was still soft, even after everything. ]
[ There's a soft scoff at that. He doubts they'd given it much thought at all. ]
Of course not. Just like a Kresnik, if you ask me.
[ Which nobody did, but isn't that exactly the point?
With his back against the wall, he briefly looks up at the ceiling, then closes his eyes and exhales.
Well. He got what he came for, and while there are other things they should probably discuss, he's not really in the mood for it. He's also not in the mood for whatever half-assed sympathy the New, Softer Julius might pretend to have for him, so... after a few moments, he steps away from the wall, smoothing his hair and doing his damnedest to look unaffected. ]
Figures I'd get this news in a place without a single proper bar around.
[ He frowns at the Kresnik comment, squinting at him, but doesn't say anything. He probably isn't wrong to a point, though that's probably more of his fault than anything else.
Not that it particularly matters, right now.
It takes a few moments after Rideaux complains about the lack of an actual bar around before Julius also pushes off the wall, rubbing his left arm. ]
True, but I did see some at the mart that's relatively cheap, if you can stomach lowering your standards for a few hours.
[ He is absolutely not offering to pay, though. He might feel bad, but he's not being that friendly. ]
[ Rideaux doesn't exactly look thrilled by that suggestion — even at his lowest point he'd usually been able to cajole some loose-moraled adult into getting him something a little nicer than convenience store beer or whatever they're selling here — but apparently this is just his existence now, so why the fuck not. ]
I suppose that's better than nothing.
[ When he notices he's not the only one taking a step toward the door, though, he pauses and turns back, raising his eyebrows. ]
I'm sorry, were you planning on coming with me, or are you just that eager to lock me out?
[ The door closes on Julius because he takes a second too long with his jacket, but he's out right after. He shoots a sharp glare at the mention of Ludger. ]
I was actually thinking of starting up again, now that you mention it.
[ Before Rideaux can fire off another retort, Julius pushes past him and turns the corner and heads for the way out. ]
[ There's not even a knock before Rideaux's door opens and Julius presses inside. It's been a long day, and the last thing that needs to happen is any more altercations like what happened back there. So it's probably a bad idea that he has an extra bottle of liquor tucked under his arm to assumedly add to whatever collection is already accruing in the room, but he figures that's about the only way he's going to get anything out of him at this point. ]
Well, that was eventful.
[ He knows he's probably going to get snapped at, but he needs this one moment to be a little bitter. As a treat. ]
[ When Julius opens the door, Rideaux is leaning back in the chair with his feet up on the corner table, having finally finished off that bottle of whiskey he'd picked up back after the first trial. There's a red headboard replacing the original metal frame that came with the hospital bed, and a faux fur throw tossed unceremoniously over the unmade bed next to his discarded coat and cravat. Shoved to the side of the table are a few smaller (mostly empty) drink bottles from the convenience store and a bottle of pills from the pharmacy.
He starts at the sound of the doorknob turning, hand instinctively reaching for one of his knives before he remembers he already took his coat off and threw it on the bed — but he relaxes again when he sees who it is, letting out a sigh that's at once both relieved and annoyed. ]
You know people usually knock before barging into someone's room.
[ Even if Julius is essentially the human manifestation of those sociopathic bachelor pads with barely any furniture in it, he can't help but agree that this is all pretty miserable. ]
Right.
[ He procures the bottle – also whiskey – and holds it out. ]
[ Rideaux scrutinizes him for a moment through narrowed eyes, like a feral cat hesitating at a stranger's offer of food. Finally he brings his feet down from the table and sits up straight. ]
You're not wrong, but what do you care?
[ He reaches to take the bottle, though he's half expecting Julius to try to pull it away at the last second, and fully prepared to kick him in the stomach if he does. ]
I'd argue it just made you an obvious target if someone is looking to try a little harder to pin it on someone. [ pause to adjust his glasses] And I have no intention of getting dragged down with you.
It's not like I gave them anything they could use that they didn't have already. They already knew I used knives, so what are they going to do, try to make it look like it was someone who can run fast?
[ And too fucking bad, because if he does go down, he is absolutely dragging you with him. ]
[ He pours himself a glass — into the only glass he has here in this room, so unless you brought your own, sorry if you thought you were sharing this. ]
What do you think I was supposed to do? If I wasn't someone who could have taken that Dancer kid on, they would have had a shockingly logical argument, and no one would have had any reason to simply take me at my word.
The assumption was also that, for some reason, you didn't have your watch with you. That would've been extremely easy to disprove without causing a scene.
[ And yet here we are! He sighs. ]
Just try to exercise a little restraint going forward. That's all I'm asking.
[ He's not trying to sound like he's parenting Ludger or whatever, he's just. Tired, fam. ]
[ That's a good move. And he seems fairly satisfied with that concession, at least... though god, don't even remind him about that part. ]
Damn right you should. [ There's a short laugh as he raises his glass to his lips again, followed by a shake of his head. ] Though surely you're not going to tell me you felt any differently.
[ As far as he's concerned, he has much more valid reason to be offended by that accusation than Julius does, but he's not delusional. ]
Good. Not that breaking your heart doesn't sound like a pretty good time, but, you know.
[ In spite of everything — where they are, the situation they're in, the fact that he's the only one getting drunk right now — something about this feels just a little bit like old times.
Not that their old times were ever really any good; everything had always been shit, when it came right down to it. Practically any memory the two of them shared that could pass for positive in his mind was obscured by a haze of alcohol or drenched in blood. And invariably, any time he thinks back on any of those moments, he just comes away from them feeling more bitter than before, reminded that those memories are all in the past because Julius decided to turn his back on the anger and desperation they were meant to share.
And that's how it is now, too. Maybe what Diluc had said about doing everyone a favor by killing someone who was slated to die anyway — maybe that hit close for both of them, and maybe it's something that they should be able to commiserate over, but it's not the same. As far as he can tell, Julius only cares about getting out of this alive because he wants to go back and die for someone else. Unforgivable, when he wants to get out of this alive because he wants to be alive, and he's the one with virtually no chance of ever returning.
His smirk fades, and he frowns down into his drink. ]
[ He makes a small noise in acknowledgement, before the room falls into a brief but – dare he think it – comfortable silence. It's hard to think that even after everything, they'd be here like this. Calling it nostalgic isn't exactly correct, given how things typically went with them when they were teenagers. But still, it's hard to complain, even if they've spent most of the time bickering.
And yet.
Julius sees that smirk fade, and he sighs, crossing over to the table and leaning against it, his hands going to either side for support. ]
You asked me a few weeks ago about whether I would be willing to send someone else to their death if whoever was the real killer was someone everyone pitied. [ pauses ] It probably would depend on the context, but as a pure hypothetical, I don't think I would. People know the risks that come with deciding to avoid detection. Having someone else pay for it just because its the "ethical" choice doesn't make it right.
[ He's aware of how hypocritical it probably sounds, but. He doesn't particularly care about the optics. ]
[ Well, he's glad Julius had to think for a few weeks about whether he'd sell him out or not, but he's not sure what he expected. He's not sure why he felt the need to come over this close to relay this, either, and he looks up at him from where he's seated with a flat expression for a few seconds. ]
...Right.
[ At least it's the answer he'd preferred, even if he doesn't love the circumstances of the delivery. And it's not like it isn't obvious why it's coming up again now.
He exhales, looking at his glass again. ]
Well. I guess it's a good thing I make it a rule not to get too personal with bartenders.
[ Or anyone else, for that matter, though a bar setting is pretty much the only kind in which he could see himself potentially letting his guard down at all. ]
[ That gets another quiet snort, as he looks down at Rideaux as he pushes his glasses back. ]
That would imply that you get personal with anyone, regardless of whether they serve you alcohol or not.
[ He turns back, picking a spot in the vinyl flooring and staring at it. ]
It's probably for the best that he didn't somehow find out any more about the chromatus before he did, otherwise it might've been a similar situation.
[ And that's part of what bothered Julius the most about what Diluc said, right before the part about doing everyone a favor – about Kimimaro selling his soul and letting himself become a monster in the process. There really isn't much of a difference between them, is there?
If you think that's some kind of jab at me, you'd better take a good look in the mirror.
[ How many years had he been the only person in the department who knew who Julius was going home to every night? Pretty much no one else left there now even knew what Julius's original name had been or that he had any special connection to Bisley — the upside of nearly every agent kicking the bucket by 40 is that hardly anyone who was with Spirius when the two of them started there is still around to remember any details of their early years with the company.
In contrast, as much as Rideaux has taken care to keep the publicly known version of his personal history carefully curated, there's at least something out there for people to latch onto and relate to.
...And frankly, he might have been willing to share a few more off-the-record details with Julius in particular (ones that couldn't easily be weaponized against him, anyway) if he'd ever given any indication that he was interested in hearing them.
But whatever. ]
Possibly. Though he did seem to make a whole thing out of the idea that Dancer had chosen to seek out that power for himself. It's not like anyone ever asked us if we wanted this.
[ Though back then, before he knew about the hidden power he already had, he would have jumped at that chance to take it for himself if anyone had offered. Even if he'd known everything he knows now, thinking back to how desperate his situation had been, he's sure he still would have.
There'd been a brief time where Bisley had seemed almost like a savior to him. Fucking pisses him off to think about that now. ]
I imagine it also would have helped that we don't look... well, like that.
[ By the way he pointedly ignores that comeback, he's essentially agreeing without saying it. He had to tell Ludger about the soul bridge in a letter, there was no way much else about what he'd done would ever see the light of day. ]
No, I guess not.
[ That didn't stop Julius from using Ludger, early on. He was only taking care of him out of guilt, but also for the added benefit of being able to use that second pocketwatch to increase the power of his chromatus. So for all intents and purposes, he doesn't really see a whole lot of a difference, as far as Julius was concerned. ]
It's quite the power to have access to, to be able to use your skeletal structure like that at will. I can't imagine it feels pleasant to use it.
Probably not. Though I'm sure he's managed to adjust to it if he's used it that much.
[ His eyes look briefly to the pill bottle there on the table, still mostly full. None of the drugs in this world have the same names as any they might be familiar with back home, but it's probably not hard to infer what these are for. ]
I wonder if he chose that power in particular, or if he was just willing to take anything and that was what he got.
[ He glances at the pill bottle, a question half forming, before he decides against it and turns back to the interesting spot in the floor. ]
That doesn't seem like anything that anyone would specifically choose, would it? At least, not how it manifests.
[ Diluc did call it a Curse Seal, after all. Doesn't sound pleasant, even if Kimimaro volunteered for it. Probably beats slowly turning into an alternate dimension, at least. ]
Not typically, but I don't know his life. It's not like children are known for rational decision making anyway; maybe he happened to be going through a phase at the time where he just thought skeletons were cool.
[ But yes, despite appearances, maybe not actually any worse than what they're stuck with.
Though on that subject... Hm.
He takes a drink, debating briefly whether he should really mention this in case it makes Julius more likely to use his power against him, and fuck if he's letting that happen. ...But, well, without little Ludger's watch on hand, they're probably on equal enough footing, actually. ]
...Catalyst transformations seem to be on hold here, by the way, or at least slowed. Not that I'm too eager to personally test the limits of that.
[ ... Well, that sort of answers the question that he had. It seemed weird that whatever had stopped his own progression wouldn't at least curb Rideaux's issues, but. Something came of it, he guesses. ]
It's good to know, at least. [ He says like he's known this whole time. That spot on the floor is looking pretty interesting right now. ] I have a feeling it probably won't be an issue, at least in the short term.
[ Like, even if Julius wasn't technically a sneeze away from turning into one at all times, it'd seem real anticlimactic for all that effort suppressing it to go to waste if one of them beefed it like that. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
week 1
8/15, late evening
So evening comes, and with no pressing urge to return to the uncomfortably familiar sterility of his own room, Rideaux comes to stop outside of Julius's instead, giving the door a sharp double-rap that's probably instantly recognizable as his own knock.
That bastard had better not blow him off. ]
ive been staring at that gif for the last hour
Run out of things to do already?
[ Even if they had more to talk about, he figured it'd be at least a little bit longer before he got around to following up on it. ]
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Oh, I'm sorry, is my fate not a matter of high enough importance?
[ He's keeping his voice low to avoid being overheard, but somehow that just makes the vitriol in it even more pronounced. ]
I'm coming in, step aside.
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[ But he quickly relents, moving back into the room and letting Rideaux in without much more of a comment, finding a spot against a wall to lean against and crosses his arms. ]
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I wanted to be certain that this wasn't all simply some elaborate dream before I resorted to using my time off on something as unpleasant as speaking with you.
[ He shuts the door behind him with more force than necessary, right on beat with that last word; then comes to take a similar stance against the adjacent wall. ]
So, tell me what you were putting off saying earlier. Why that theory that they never encountered me because I was already here wasn't plausible.
[ He already has a pretty good idea — the same immediate thought that had frozen him in his tracks after that first "Doesn't seem like your plan worked" the other day — and he absolutely hates it. He's not going to be the one to put it out there, though; he's going to make Julius say it to his face. ]
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Like I said before, I met up with Ludger and the rest of his group in Marksburg, after they managed to get out of Spirius. [ beat ] Not long after that, Bisley entered Canaan with the Key.
[ There's not a lot of inflection in his tone, but even if he knows that Rideaux knows already, it's pretty clear that he didn't mean that Elle was the way to get there. ]
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And that's what this is — as much as he hates Julius, he knows him better than anyone, and he knows he's too boring to bother making something like this up just to mess with someone. And as nice as it would be to be able to pretend he could somehow change that outcome himself if he went back, they're both from the prime dimension. If Julius is from a later point in time than he is, then it's already set in stone. He's stubborn enough to spend more than a decade fighting a near-certain losing battle, but he's not an idiot.
Maybe the most offensive part of this is that even his last ditch backup plan — if one could even call it that — had apparently been a failure. If a loss had been inevitable, he would have at least tried to make sure Ludger killed him so that Bisley couldn't. Had Ludger seen through that, or had he just pitied him and thought that he was doing him some kind of favor by letting him live?
Classic Kresnik, honestly. Can't even let him have his one last fuck-you to the world.
He stares straight ahead, over the hospital bed in the center of the room, at some unremarkable spot on the wall opposite him.
God. ]
Well. Congratulations, then.
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I don't know what happened. Ludger didn't say what went on between you two. It seemed like they didn't know how it got to that point.
[ Even if he knew about the soul bridge then, it felt out of character for Ludger to be willing to let that happen, even to someone he was at odds with. He was still soft, even after everything. ]
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Of course not. Just like a Kresnik, if you ask me.
[ Which nobody did, but isn't that exactly the point?
With his back against the wall, he briefly looks up at the ceiling, then closes his eyes and exhales.
Well. He got what he came for, and while there are other things they should probably discuss, he's not really in the mood for it. He's also not in the mood for whatever half-assed sympathy the New, Softer Julius might pretend to have for him, so... after a few moments, he steps away from the wall, smoothing his hair and doing his damnedest to look unaffected. ]
Figures I'd get this news in a place without a single proper bar around.
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Not that it particularly matters, right now.
It takes a few moments after Rideaux complains about the lack of an actual bar around before Julius also pushes off the wall, rubbing his left arm. ]
True, but I did see some at the mart that's relatively cheap, if you can stomach lowering your standards for a few hours.
[ He is absolutely not offering to pay, though. He might feel bad, but he's not being that friendly. ]
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I suppose that's better than nothing.
[ When he notices he's not the only one taking a step toward the door, though, he pauses and turns back, raising his eyebrows. ]
I'm sorry, were you planning on coming with me, or are you just that eager to lock me out?
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[ He sighs, moving to grab his jacket off the rack and slip it on. ]
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[ He continues to the door, then, though he doesn't bother holding it open behind him for more than a few seconds. ]
I'm sure you must be pretty hard up for a night out after all those years of babysitting.
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I was actually thinking of starting up again, now that you mention it.
[ Before Rideaux can fire off another retort, Julius pushes past him and turns the corner and heads for the way out. ]
week 2
during the end of trial
😒 Honestly ready for the execution at this point.
and some time later after that goes ignored
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[ Huffs and puts his phone back in his pocket. ]
week 3
post-trial
Well, that was eventful.
[ He knows he's probably going to get snapped at, but he needs this one moment to be a little bitter. As a treat. ]
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He starts at the sound of the doorknob turning, hand instinctively reaching for one of his knives before he remembers he already took his coat off and threw it on the bed — but he relaxes again when he sees who it is, letting out a sigh that's at once both relieved and annoyed. ]
You know people usually knock before barging into someone's room.
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I'll be sure to remember that for next time.
[ Maybe. We'll see. Julius crosses the gap over to where Rideaux is sitting, the bright red headboard obviously a point of focus. ]
I like what you've done with the place.
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[ There's a slight shrug. ]
But I don't think you came here just to patronize me and my decorating.
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Right.
[ He procures the bottle – also whiskey – and holds it out. ]
Figured you might need another one of these.
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You're not wrong, but what do you care?
[ He reaches to take the bottle, though he's half expecting Julius to try to pull it away at the last second, and fully prepared to kick him in the stomach if he does. ]
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I don't. I'm just looking to make sure that little spectacle that just happened doesn't carry over beyond today.
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Please, you should be thanking me for that. Now they should all know better than to try coming after either of us.
[ He's not too eager to use the chromatus any more than he has to these days either, you know. ]
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[ And too fucking bad, because if he does go down, he is absolutely dragging you with him. ]
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No, but if that's how it's going to play out every time, at some point someone's going to suddenly decide that it seems like an admission of guilt.
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[ He pours himself a glass — into the only glass he has here in this room, so unless you brought your own, sorry if you thought you were sharing this. ]
What do you think I was supposed to do? If I wasn't someone who could have taken that Dancer kid on, they would have had a shockingly logical argument, and no one would have had any reason to simply take me at my word.
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[ And yet here we are! He sighs. ]
Just try to exercise a little restraint going forward. That's all I'm asking.
[ He's not trying to sound like he's parenting Ludger or whatever, he's just. Tired, fam. ]
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[ Not that she'd ever had to ask him to do that, though it hadn't mattered anyway.
He takes a long drink. ]
Anyway, I exercised plenty of restraint. The kid's still in one piece, and I didn't even lay a finger on that oversized jackass.
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I guess.
[ To be fair, that is restraint for him, comparatively speaking. They've both done a lot worse for much, much less. ]
I suppose I should be impressed that's all that happened, given your face when Robin was talking about us.
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Damn right you should. [ There's a short laugh as he raises his glass to his lips again, followed by a shake of his head. ] Though surely you're not going to tell me you felt any differently.
[ As far as he's concerned, he has much more valid reason to be offended by that accusation than Julius does, but he's not delusional. ]
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Not a chance.
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[ In spite of everything — where they are, the situation they're in, the fact that he's the only one getting drunk right now — something about this feels just a little bit like old times.
Not that their old times were ever really any good; everything had always been shit, when it came right down to it. Practically any memory the two of them shared that could pass for positive in his mind was obscured by a haze of alcohol or drenched in blood. And invariably, any time he thinks back on any of those moments, he just comes away from them feeling more bitter than before, reminded that those memories are all in the past because Julius decided to turn his back on the anger and desperation they were meant to share.
And that's how it is now, too. Maybe what Diluc had said about doing everyone a favor by killing someone who was slated to die anyway — maybe that hit close for both of them, and maybe it's something that they should be able to commiserate over, but it's not the same. As far as he can tell, Julius only cares about getting out of this alive because he wants to go back and die for someone else. Unforgivable, when he wants to get out of this alive because he wants to be alive, and he's the one with virtually no chance of ever returning.
His smirk fades, and he frowns down into his drink. ]
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And yet.
Julius sees that smirk fade, and he sighs, crossing over to the table and leaning against it, his hands going to either side for support. ]
You asked me a few weeks ago about whether I would be willing to send someone else to their death if whoever was the real killer was someone everyone pitied. [ pauses ] It probably would depend on the context, but as a pure hypothetical, I don't think I would. People know the risks that come with deciding to avoid detection. Having someone else pay for it just because its the "ethical" choice doesn't make it right.
[ He's aware of how hypocritical it probably sounds, but. He doesn't particularly care about the optics. ]
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...Right.
[ At least it's the answer he'd preferred, even if he doesn't love the circumstances of the delivery. And it's not like it isn't obvious why it's coming up again now.
He exhales, looking at his glass again. ]
Well. I guess it's a good thing I make it a rule not to get too personal with bartenders.
[ Or anyone else, for that matter, though a bar setting is pretty much the only kind in which he could see himself potentially letting his guard down at all. ]
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That would imply that you get personal with anyone, regardless of whether they serve you alcohol or not.
[ He turns back, picking a spot in the vinyl flooring and staring at it. ]
It's probably for the best that he didn't somehow find out any more about the chromatus before he did, otherwise it might've been a similar situation.
[ And that's part of what bothered Julius the most about what Diluc said, right before the part about doing everyone a favor – about Kimimaro selling his soul and letting himself become a monster in the process. There really isn't much of a difference between them, is there?
He hand goes to his left arm absentmindedly. ]
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[ How many years had he been the only person in the department who knew who Julius was going home to every night? Pretty much no one else left there now even knew what Julius's original name had been or that he had any special connection to Bisley — the upside of nearly every agent kicking the bucket by 40 is that hardly anyone who was with Spirius when the two of them started there is still around to remember any details of their early years with the company.
In contrast, as much as Rideaux has taken care to keep the publicly known version of his personal history carefully curated, there's at least something out there for people to latch onto and relate to.
...And frankly, he might have been willing to share a few more off-the-record details with Julius in particular (ones that couldn't easily be weaponized against him, anyway) if he'd ever given any indication that he was interested in hearing them.
But whatever. ]
Possibly. Though he did seem to make a whole thing out of the idea that Dancer had chosen to seek out that power for himself. It's not like anyone ever asked us if we wanted this.
[ Though back then, before he knew about the hidden power he already had, he would have jumped at that chance to take it for himself if anyone had offered. Even if he'd known everything he knows now, thinking back to how desperate his situation had been, he's sure he still would have.
There'd been a brief time where Bisley had seemed almost like a savior to him. Fucking pisses him off to think about that now. ]
I imagine it also would have helped that we don't look... well, like that.
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No, I guess not.
[ That didn't stop Julius from using Ludger, early on. He was only taking care of him out of guilt, but also for the added benefit of being able to use that second pocketwatch to increase the power of his chromatus. So for all intents and purposes, he doesn't really see a whole lot of a difference, as far as Julius was concerned. ]
It's quite the power to have access to, to be able to use your skeletal structure like that at will. I can't imagine it feels pleasant to use it.
no subject
[ His eyes look briefly to the pill bottle there on the table, still mostly full. None of the drugs in this world have the same names as any they might be familiar with back home, but it's probably not hard to infer what these are for. ]
I wonder if he chose that power in particular, or if he was just willing to take anything and that was what he got.
no subject
That doesn't seem like anything that anyone would specifically choose, would it? At least, not how it manifests.
[ Diluc did call it a Curse Seal, after all. Doesn't sound pleasant, even if Kimimaro volunteered for it. Probably beats slowly turning into an alternate dimension, at least. ]
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Not typically, but I don't know his life. It's not like children are known for rational decision making anyway; maybe he happened to be going through a phase at the time where he just thought skeletons were cool.
[ But yes, despite appearances, maybe not actually any worse than what they're stuck with.
Though on that subject... Hm.
He takes a drink, debating briefly whether he should really mention this in case it makes Julius more likely to use his power against him, and fuck if he's letting that happen. ...But, well, without little Ludger's watch on hand, they're probably on equal enough footing, actually. ]
...Catalyst transformations seem to be on hold here, by the way, or at least slowed. Not that I'm too eager to personally test the limits of that.
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It's good to know, at least. [ He says like he's known this whole time. That spot on the floor is looking pretty interesting right now. ] I have a feeling it probably won't be an issue, at least in the short term.
[ Like, even if Julius wasn't technically a sneeze away from turning into one at all times, it'd seem real anticlimactic for all that effort suppressing it to go to waste if one of them beefed it like that. ]